Miss H Chondriac

GP Visits: 2

Self help books read: 1 + Harry Potter

internet searches: 43

Couselling referrals: 1

Acupuncture Referrals:1

Bottle of Vitamins: 2

Tuna consumed: 15 cans

Beetroot Consumed: 2 jars

My GP is blanking me. As a new subscriber to GP Weekly, I know she must be cross about Alan Johnson and his insistence on extra opening hours.

Wonder if she’s on a pre-emptive strike? A woman with principles and medical know-how. Got to be worth stalking for a bit longer.

Have distraction in form of new Tuna Fish and beetroot habit. It lowers your blood pressure if you drink half a litre of beetroot per day and plenty of tuna fish. Mouth is purple and smell of fish but feel delightful. The only tiresome thing is that local Tesco Express can’t keep up with demand.There was a stampede for salad and burgers when i was quietly demanding more Beetroot and tuna be available,must be the hot weather….

I have called Tesco’s Head office  to complain about lack of regard for health and safety legislation. Glad I can now use mobile safe in knowledge that I won’t get brain cancer, although now have no excuse for blurry vision other than refusal to wear glasses.

Mouth may indeed be an odd colour but at least there’s fluoride in my water.Marc Has started to complain about the Tuna stench too.

Don’t know why they don’t go the whole hog and add vitamins, minerals and cod-liver oil as well, I’d save a fortune in pills from Boots.

Anyway, off to consume some Diabetic Chocolate (Available in Thornton’s)in the hope of preventing diabetes. Have placed mobile in pocket all day in-case i have a phone call from GP surgery saying that she believes me and has found a cure. Have called and left another message.

Marc says I’m behaving like a lunatic which makes me happy. Suspected lunacy is a perfectly valid reason to visit your GP.